Stuck in a (Mom) Rut
By Glinda
When my husband met me oh so many moons ago, I had long blonde hair, down to the mid-back. You know, hair that you would have in your carefree early twenties. He liked it so much, he decided to marry me.
Knowing that he liked my hair long, I kept it the same way for almost fifteen years- no bangs, all one length. Even after the Munchkin was born, I cut some of it off, but it quickly grew back to my original length.
Then about eight months ago, I began hankering for a change. For layers, for volume, for something other than what I had been staring in the mirror at for so long. I informed my husband of this, and he looked at me and said, “As long as you don’t get “mom hair.”
Uh, excuse me?
But the sad part is, I knew what he meant by that phrase, even though he was joking. Or so he said, even as he ducked behind a pillow to avoid the flying projectile headed his direction. The same way that everyone knows what “mom jeans” are. And you just know on those makeover shows that the majority of the women are going to be frumpy moms made over into fabulous.
Why is that?
Sometimes it is all too easy to just sort of stay stuck in our little ruts we have created for ourselves. Sometimes we are too busy caring for others instead of caring for ourselves. Sometimes money is running short, and we’d rather spend it on our kids than ourselves.
These are all convenient excuses to not keep our looks updated. I’m not talking spending oodles of money on clothes, but something from a store that has nary a pair of sweatpants in sight. We figure, hey, I’ve always looked good in this style, so I still will.
Not always, my friends, not always.
I say we try to change the perception of moms as being unhip and downright frowsy. That “mom hair” not be hair that is necessarily cut just for ease of styling, but with individual style in mind. That “mom jeans” be jeans that while still allowing their owner to bend down and pick up their fleeing toddler, fit nicely and flatter the figure. And preferably were purchased less than well, fifteen years ago.
There’s got to be some middle ground between the fine ladies pictured above and this:
Right?
Let’s make the change one set of low-rise jeans at a time!
December 18th, 2007 at 10:49 am
I’m all for low-rise jeans, as long as the low-rise doesn’t become a moonrise when picking up said fleeing toddler.
But I’m on the edge of my seat now. What kind of non-Mom Hair did you go with?
December 18th, 2007 at 12:53 pm
Not only must I have mom hair, but I’m so comfy in my mom jeans. Nah, not really.
December 18th, 2007 at 2:13 pm
You know, low-rise jeans are and always have been a dumb idea; how did they ever get so popular? Is the world THAT fond of muffin tops? Pants that go only to the widest part of your hips are pants that will never stay up properly.
December 18th, 2007 at 4:29 pm
No, there are some low-rise ones that can flatter almost every shape. I have some that I really like, and they are more comfortable than the high-rise. You can get a set of low-ish rise, they don’t have to be all the way down to your crotch, ya know!
December 18th, 2007 at 4:37 pm
I have a very short rise, so low-rise are mid-rise and mid-rise are waist high. This trend has been a blessing, since my jeans no longer go up to my boobs. (I have very long legs for my height, so nothing really fits anyway)
As a big girl, I am in love with Lane Bryant’s Right Fit jeans. They are not for everyone, but there are those of us that they are made for.
I so have mom hair, though. I just got it all cut off again….
December 18th, 2007 at 8:59 pm
Oh oh oh oh the hair! What is it with men and long hair? Ditto all of that except whenever I announce I’d like a haircut, something different and perhaps maybe, dare I say *gasp* shorter my husband nearly has a heart attack. Cut? Your? Hair? Whhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhyyyyyyyyyyy? It’s so pretty long.
Says the man with the easy military high and tight and who has *no* idea how hard it is to take care of hair longer than a half inch. So, I’ll get a trim and then it’s grown out to mid back length, again, where it is now. Not flattering to my face but can’t tell him that. Love him. I want to look good for him but, my hair? Has been known to attack people. I call it the Kraken. Two days ago I found a few strands wrapped around my baby’s neck. Really.
Last week I told that I’m cutting my hair and I showed him three pictures of preapproved by me styles I like. Actually it was the same style just short, medium and long. He picked the medium! Wow! Color me surprised!
Now I have to find someone who can cut curly hair and who won’t try to blow dry it straight. I might just do it myself.
Having just had a baby three months ago I can’t even begin to think about new clothes. I’m still stuck with all this baby weight.
Would you post a pic of your new ‘do? We can caption it. *grin*
December 18th, 2007 at 9:17 pm
Ha! I would be slightly afraid of the captioning, I think!
Basically, she cut off about five inches, leaving the longest length to the top of my shoulder blades. Then, she layered a second “level” if you will, with face-framing layers that can either flip up or be scrunched wavy if I want. Since she cut off a lot of length, my hair will do a slight wave now.
I like it a lot, and so does my husband. It was a nice compromise, as it doesn’t just “hang there” like it did before. It has lots of movement, but still qualifies as long.
December 18th, 2007 at 10:42 pm
A buddy at work saw my old driver’s license picture (that I absolutely LOVED) and he said “Holy crap – you have soccer mom hair”!! I smacked him. Then I asked him what that meant. He said it was perfectly coiffed (sp??) suburbuan looking mom-hair.
And I REALLY loved that haircut. LOVED. IT.
December 19th, 2007 at 4:47 am
Glinda, I have to start taking you jeans shopping with me. I’m very hourglassy, and even with a belt low-rise jeans tend to slip down. Since I’m not actually a shoplifter, I have no use for this. I actually looked into getting suspenders, but they’re too Mork from Ork for my liking. Jeans that have a waistband that hits the waist stay up.
Since I’m short, I buy low-rise jeans and half the time they come to my waist anyway…ten inches too wide.
December 19th, 2007 at 2:48 pm
Ugh, raincoaster, I have the same problem. I’ve given up and I just find pants that fit in the hips and take in the waist a few inches.
December 21st, 2007 at 2:25 am
It turns out that a lot of the Star Trek hotties from the Kirk/Spock era had “mom hair” too!
Gallery of Star Trek Hotties
August 29th, 2008 at 2:01 pm
Raincoaster, it sounds as if you may need a “petite” in your jeans – regardless of your actual height. It sounds as if you’re short through the crotch (that is, through the pelvis – from the waist to the fork), and non-petite low rises will not rise low on you.
It’s been my experience that with an hourglass figure, the most flattering rise on trousers is two fingers’ width below the navel. It makes it much easier to fit (even if it has to be taken in) and it helps to disguise any belly bulge you may have (it certainly disguises mine). I have also seen that waist-high trousers (that end ABOVE the belly) accentuate the bulge, and can create one where one never existed.
My hair is now long enough that the cat sits on it if I’m sitting down and he’s in my lap. I had a friend who had hair almost as long – nearly waist-length – for as long as I’d known her and her daughter. When her daughter was about 16 or so, Mom got a new boyfriend and cut her hair. It’s … a nice enough cut, I guess, and it doesn’t uglify her, but she no longer looks like herself. She does look like someone’s Mom, and she always simply looked like an adult woman before that. Somehow, a lot of sparkle and individuality seemed to go with those clipped hairs. I’m not saying it would for anyone else, necessarily, but it sure did with her.