We always do a family egg hunt every Easter, and sometimes we go to hunts sponsored by local parks.  This year was one of those years, we were meeting a friend of mine who has a daughter almost the same age as the Munchkinette.

So of course there is a taped off area full of eggs, and for our age group (1-3 years) a bunch of kids who really didn’t know exactly what was going on.  I know mine certainly didn’t.

But the parents sure did.

The parents kept pushing the tape boundaries, inching ever closer to the eggs.  One lady in front of us had extended the tape a good three feet into the “egg area” so that the city workers were forced to move some of the eggs which were now very much in arm’s reach.

That should have given me my first clue as to how this was going to go down.

For our age group, we were instructed to not help our children, and only let them pick up what they themselves could put in their basket.

They might as well have been whispering in a hurricane for all the good that announcement did.

When the air horn went off, I of course allowed my daughter to bend over and pick up an egg, only to have a helicopter parent of another child swoop it into her arms, along with the dozen other eggs she already had.

I loudly exclaimed that only the kids were allowed to pick up eggs, and was treated as if I did not exist.

This woman was definitely not the only person with this mindset, as I saw kids who could barely walk with baskets filled to the brim with eggs.

Mine got four.

WTF, people?

No wonder cities have been cancelling egg hunts.

This stuff is FREE.  There were some kids who got no eggs at all.  Your precious spawn truly does not care about the contents of the stupid eggs, which tend to be things more commonly found at the 99 Cent Store.  Would it kill people to actually follow the rules and have a little humanity?

An early life lesson for my daughter is that the answer is yes, it apparently would.

I went to Tarjay recently and bought my daughter some sippy cups.  I needed new ones because although she loves the kind with the straws, she has chewed said straws down to the nub.  So I decided to just get the latest in technology ”unspillable” kind, especially as she has a penchant for dumping water all over the floor and my leather furniture.

The cups were on the lowest rung of the display, and one cup was orange and one cup was pink.  I definitely noticed animals on one cup, and only quickly glanced at the other one. Whatever, it was pink.  As long as both of them weren’t pink, I was good.

Until I got home and opened the package.

OK, ignore the purple cup. Do you see the graphics on the pink one? It’s got a purse, a makeup brush, a compact, and a mirror, among other things.

Am I wrong to think that this is just a bit too mature for a two year old?

I love makeup. I write a beauty blog. My daughter enjoys watching me put makeup on.

But it just seems wrong.

Amirite?

I can’t even rely on my nine year old to find a pair of socks in his sock drawer, much less keep an eye out to protect my multimillion dollar illegal operation.

A list of the first baby names of 2012 by state recently came out, and there are definitely a few humdingers.

Apparently there was a trend of a lot of names beginning with the letter K and the letter A. Even though I didn’t give birth in 2012, I’m OK with not being on trend.

A few that leapt out at me:

Kentucky: Kay’lyn

I thought that the whole apostrophe within a name thing was so very over.  I was so very wrong.

New Mexico: Daytona Jaymes

There are, to me, two things wrong with this name.

South Dakota: Kalylah

I have no idea where they came up with this one, or how to pronounce it.  Awkwardly, I guess.

Wyoming: Khloe

The Kardashian influence has gone much too far.

Ohio: Anya

A Project Runway fan, it seems.

Arkansas: Wesley Ren

Ditto Princess Bride.

Nevada: Envy Essence-Faye

I could deal with this if it was rearranged.  Maybe.

You may have heard by now that Lego has come out with a new line designed specifically for girls.

And you know, I’m good with that. I think that even though the concept of Lego is universal, not every girl wants to build police cars and assault vehicles and whatnot.

But this?

This seems just a bit too genderized for me. I don’t have a problem with having things like the tree house or the pet house, but why oh why does everything have to have pink and purple? Could they have not launched the new sets with regular colors?

This is an old advertisement from the 70′s (I think) in which the girl, admittedly a bit tomboy-ish looking, is holding a creation built out of standard Lego bricks.

What happened between then and now?

I had my own Lego sets in the 70′s, and granted, it was a “house” set with a kitchen and living room, but I loved it. It wasn’t pink or purple or glittery, and yet it was one of my favorite toys.

Imagine that!

To be cussed at by a plastic doll.

Yay or nay on the baby cursing? The internets seem to be divided.  One commenter suggested you would only hear what your filthy mind WANTED to hear.  I assure you what I heard was in no way lurking in my subconscious.

Seriously?

People have asked other people to send them the spit-infested lollipop of a sick child so that their child could contract chicken pox?

Good Lord.

First, it’s a federal offense, second, it won’t even work and third, WHAT THE F@&# IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?

I used to give vaccine-deniers some leeway, but after being proven that a certain oft-quoted study was completely discredited, I will allow no quarter.

Vaccinate your damn kids!

That way, your damn kids won’t give a disease that should by all rights be eradicated to an unsuspecting infant or person with a lowered immune system.

Again, WHAT THE F@&# IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?

Courtesy of Levi’s.

Yeah, because a sweatshirt with a fake denim jacket screened on the front of it is SO COOL!  Because everyone knows that denim in the front and sweatshirt material on the back is the new mullet!

Listen, they make ACTUAL denim everything for toddlers, so I suggest simply going that route if you are really into that type of thing.

And Jesus Christ on a stick, they want almost thirty bucks for this crap?

Just say no, ladies, just say no to the newest version of the mullet.

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