Teeny Manolo

Martha Stewart is my favorite felon. Not only did the woman come second in the highly competitive cell decorating contest at Camp Cupcake, but she never lets anything phase her, whether it’s hard-line questioning from District Attorneys, gooey come-ons from Conan O’Brian, or mere questions of taste.

See for yourself! Here is a snippet of Martha’s show from October a couple of years ago preparing for Thanksgiving (either she really thinks ahead or she was pandering to the Canadian viewers in hopes of obtaining long-denied permission to enter the country). Note that her mouth-watering food-themed centerpieces were fashioned from the finest fabrics, hypoallergenic stuffing material, and fresh, innocent babies.

from the Hater:

I don’t know why this video is so creepy. Well, actually, I know exactly why this video is so creepy: it features overhead shot after overhead shot of a table full of babies dressed like over-sized food products, their chubby arms and legs squirming beneath the giant foodstuffs that have become their prisons.

I suppose there are worse fates.

Our evil nemesis Elmo has inspired our captioneers with his unique brand of debauchery and sadism, so naturally it was a dirty battle for the top spot, but we have a winner!

Bellamama Says:
September 7th, 2008 at 3:12 pm

Though he originally claimed it was a simple translation error, investigators have now revealed that Elmo signed a multi-million dollar contract with the hand soap companies in Japan.

Congratulations, imaginary swag, and effective sanitation to Bellamama! What shall we present as our virtual prize? I think this occasion calls for something a little different. Something powerful, yet feminine. Something irresistable. Something Prada
:

Oh, I should have expected this. So many stars, even those who are well-behaved at home, go a bit crazy once they get overseas. And we have heard ALL about Elmo!