The Biggest Faux Pas A Woman Can Make
By Glinda
No, I’m not talking about wearing the same dress. Nosirree, this one is waaaay worse than that. I’m not even going to count something like sleeping with someone else’s spouse as a faux pas, that’s practically a crime.
I’m talking about asking a woman if she’s pregnant. And then finding out she isn’t.
I made this mistake once. It took only once, with the withering glare of hatred directed my well-intentioned way, to cure me of ever even thinking of posing that question again.
I remember it all very clearly. I was at a salon getting my hair done, and one of the stylist’s daughters came in with two of her kids. She was very thin, except for a belly that protruded out much like a small basketball. She looked exactly like I have seen so many of my very thin pregnant women friends look, and so I stupidly airily asked her mother when she was due.
I’m not kidding when I swear I saw lightining bolts come ouf of her mom’s eyes.
“She’s not pregnant!” she snapped. I wanted to suddenly have all my hair covering my face a la Thing, but unfortunately it was pulled up in foils. I had entered dangerous territory and there was nowhere to hide.
“Oh, uh, sorry!” I stuttered. “She’s just so trim except for the…” I weakly trailed off. The situation was dire, and there was no way to save it. I was toast. She knew it and I knew it. Luckily, I didn’t like that salon very much, and never went back to face the source of my shame. I know, I know, I’m a big coward.
Now being seven months pregnant, I can see other women looking at my tummy quizzically. Is she or isn’t she? She looks like she might be…
But I know that no one is going to ask. They all know better.
August 27th, 2009 at 1:40 pm
I believe it was Dave Barry that said soemthing along the lines of “unless you see a woman in the act of briethingenever ask if they are pregnant”. I try and live by that rule.
August 28th, 2009 at 9:44 am
Oh no! I’ve done this too. Only once.
I was working at a shop where we sold new mommy jewelry and a woman with a slim body and popping belly was fingering the mommy charm bracelets.
I asked her when she was due…well, if looks could kill!
I was so embarrassed! Never, never, never again.
I guess we all do it once and then just glue our mouths shut.
(btw: congrats Glinda! I’m glad I can go by your declaration and don’t have to sit there staring at your cute tummy wondering and unable to ask.)
August 28th, 2009 at 9:55 am
Ugh — it is horrible to be on the receiving end of this!! I was out with a friend (at a BAR), wearing one of those flowy, empire cut tops that were in style at the time. As I walked to the bathroom (with a BEER in hand) some a$$hole asked me “when are you due?”!! I don’t know if he was supremely dumb or just being intentionally rude, but you better believe I went home and threw that shirt out 😛