Notes From the Trenches of Boredom
By Glinda
From the desk of the Munchkin
It is day 2 of my so-called “summer vacation.” Except I call it the most boring two days of my entire life.
The ogre in the other room, aka Mom, is refusing to buy me all of the toys that I know for absolute sure will make me never bored again. She keeps saying something about how she just bought me a really expensive Lego set for my good grades, yadda yadda yadda.
I know that I said it would make me the happiest little boy in the world if I got that Lego set and that I would play with it every day. I just now realize that I could be even happier with even more stuff.
Her suggestions to go outside and get some fresh air are good for only about ten minutes. There is only so much to do outside. It’s boring.
Then she had the ludicrous idea that perhaps I should pick up some of the thousands of Legos that adorn the floor of my room and the living room. Can you believe this woman? It’s summer vacation for goodness sakes! I worked hard all through the school year, and now I am on strike from any type of work.
My goals this week:
1. To harass the ogre at every turn about buying me more toys
2. To make a complete mess of the house within 10.3 minutes of waking up
3. To drive the ogre crazy
#3 is going well. #2 took me 13.7 minutes today, I’m going to have to train to get my time down. #1 is really easy.
The ogre says that maybe today we can go to Target and pick up some art supplies.
You know your life is pretty sad when going to Target is the best part of your day.
June 16th, 2009 at 4:57 pm
That ogre clearly is ruining your life. Can you stage a coup?
June 17th, 2009 at 12:56 am
I’m with Suzanne. You need to use that “go outside and play” time to make friends in the park. Once you have an army-sized gang of friends, you can take over with ease.
June 17th, 2009 at 2:17 pm
Oh, the old “I’m so bored!” refrain. That stops when I tell my kids I will find plenty of things for them to do, like clean the house.
Or: Tell him that he didn’t complain he was bored when he went to school, so hey let’s go to the school supply store and get a bunch of workbooks to do!