Stolen from a post over at the delightfully twisted dadsmacker blog entitled “As if we needed more evidence that China will soon rule the world,” this is actual video footage of a Taiwanese kindergarten English class. Think about that; they get languages in Kindergarten. Who do you know who’s doing that, other than MadMan Jolie-Pitt, over at the Lycée?

Zut alors!

The teacher’s comments:

This is the way to teach English to Asian kids…the MC Hammer way. I work at an English school in Taiwan and was asked to come up with an idea for a performance. So I came up with this. This video shows one of our first practice sessions putting the whole thing together.

The only thing that could make this better is if they were wearing actual HammerPants. Here’s the video of the final, costumed performance, for fans of green, vaguely tinselly costumes on HammerDancing Taiwanese Kindergarteners. Here’s what their teacher says:

The kids were totally petrified, and performed way worse than the rehersals, but what can I expect from 5 year olds dancing and singing in another language. The best part is at 1:57. These kids have no shame. Keep in mind there were a couple hundred well-to-do parents in the audience. It’s not cheap to send your kids to English schools in Taiwan. But now they can rest easy knowing their money is being well spent. Haha, like on the costumes for example…

By the way, did you know MC Hammer has a blog?

I see it’s an outie. Here’s the lovely Milla Jovovich, your basic immigrant megasuccess story. If I can make a wee confession here, I was always jealous of her; the international modeling career at eleven, the really quite sophisticated album at eighteen, the ice-blue eyes, the fashion line, the men, the movies, the millions.

And now, I have one more thing to be jealous of: how good she looks pregnant. You can see by her arms that she’s put on a bit of weight all over relative to her acting weight, but not vast, Fergie-like amounts. And she is living proof that your looks won’t go to pot when you do that. She feels no need to cover up those decidedly un-stringy arms. Those sexy female hormones need some lipids to work their magic.

One must confess, however, that an eight-months-and-looks-about-to-pop woman watching a horror flick like Resident Evil:Extinction isn’t exactly an advertisement for how gut-wrenchingly horrifying the movie may be. Sure, sure, she’s starring in it. She knows how it ends. I’m just thinking that, if Mama Jovovich’s nerves were less steely, the future Milla Junior’s rebirthing sessions could have been very interesting.

Your caption suggestions in the comments, plzthxkbai!

from the Forgotten Faces Flickrstream