Teeny Manolo: Celebrating the Joys of Parenting and Childhood - Part 29



Well, unless of course you spend upwards of seventy dollars or so on your kid’s Halloween costume.  Then I guess you get to look smug.

This “dark angel” number will set you back a mere $88.00

But it’s much better than something like this:

The main costume is $98.00, but it doesn’t include the leggings, hat, or wings.  So I dare someone to put on just the dress part and have anyone recognize it as a phoenix.

 

 

The Alice costume they have is plain as can be, it’s the Queen of Hearts that gets all the love. As well it should for a hundred bucks.

If you would like your daughter to be the “Vampiress of Versailles” you will be charging $128.00 onto your credit card.

OK, I actually really like this costume.  But, if you want it to look just like it does in the picture, it will be around $160.00

Normally I’m all for unconventional costumes, but this one is a teensy bit baffling.  And for a hundred dollars, nobody should be guessing what you are.

To be fair, they do have some more reasonably priced costumes on the site, but they are considerably plainer and generic, so I should be glad that’s reflected in the price.  Right?



The Scourge of the Playroom

September 20th, 2011
By Glinda

I freely admit it.

Today I was that mom and my daughter was that kid.

You see, my toddler has taken to spending three or four hours of the night awake.  Sometimes screeching, sometimes whining, sometimes just laying there.

I have no idea why.  And yes, I’ve tried pretty much everything to get it to stop.

Nothing works.

Anyhoo, everyone knows that when a toddler isn’t sleeping, that means mama isn’t sleeping either.

So even though I briefly pondered not taking my son to his early morning Spanish class, I chastised myself into packing us all into the minivan.

The class is an hour, and we live fifteen minutes away, so I figured daughter and I would stay and play in the play area set up for younger siblings in the lobby.  And hey, maybe she would make some new friends!

Ha.

I don’t know if it was because she was a bit tired herself, but my daughter managed to terrorize the entire population of the play area.  Yeah 18 month old kid, you thought you had that chair.  Not according to my daughter, who actually sat down in the chair behind you and pushed you off.

She also dumped an entire box of Duplos on the floor, and then decided they didn’t belong in the play area and ran to put them out in the hallway.

She grabbed things out of other people’s hands just because she wanted them for that nanosecond, even though she had cared less about them when they were on the ground.

She threw a block at someone.

She attempted to bite another child’s banana.  Which was in his hands at the time.

The coup de grace was when she dumped an entire bucket of crayons onto the table, and of course eventually the floor, which four other children had managed not to do.

Commence the hideous, glass-breaking shrieking when I decided we needed to take a little walk outside.

Ditto when I strapped her into the car seat and on the entire ride home.

Yes, I know it’s just a phase and she will eventually get better, it just seems like the bad phases last a hell of a lot longer than the good ones.

 

 



Monday Teeny Poll

September 19th, 2011
By Glinda

I should have known there was going to be trouble because I had the audacity to go out. As punishment, my daughter decided she was going to be up from 9:30PM to 12:30AM, which, uh, sort of ate up my writing time. So, sorry about the lateness of the poll. It may or may not be particularly coherent, but at least there will be something.

Last week’s poll was a mixed bag regarding wedding vow renewal, with 51% saying it really doesn’t matter. 27% thought that renewing vows was very romantical, and 21% said that it qualifies for a big L on the forehead.

Recently New Jersey passed the nation’s most restrictive anti-bullying law, as explained here in the New York Times.



Celebrity Dad Faceoff 2.0

September 16th, 2011
By Glinda

Oh my Lord of the Rings, Sean Bean actually beat out Jason Momoa!

I must say I am completely surprised.  Not that he isn’t hella sexy, but I wondered for a second if you would be blinded by the glory of Jason’s abdominal area.

I should never have doubted you.

Today I’ve got a cutie I remember very well from a movie from the 80’s entitled Goonies. If you are not a Gen X-er, then you probably have never seen this movie.  However, much like our other Sean, this particular Sean was also in three very successful Peter Jackson-directed films.

VERSUS



But that doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy this Baby Godfather meme, right?

source



Pants for All!

September 14th, 2011
By Glinda

According to an article in the LA Times, some schools in Britain are sick and tired of the “skirt creep” that some young girls are wont to do and are solving the problem by banning skirts altogether.

As someone who was FORCED to wear skirts EVERY SINGLE DAY for all twelve of my school years (uh, not including college, natch) I applaud this decision heartily.

Skirts, as school wear, generally suck.

Nothing is more miserable than having to wear a skirt in cold, rainy weather.  And tights don’t quite cut it in the warmth department.  In fact, we were not allowed to wear tights, only socks.  I remember attempting to pull my thick wool skirt over the tops of my knees outside at lunch in order to keep my kneecaps from becoming frostbitten.  I was in Southern California, so it wasn’t actually all that cold, but try telling that to my poor, shivering kneecaps.

Also, nothing is more embarrassing than having your skirt fly up, and this can happen due to more reasons than you would think.  Bloomers are an option, as are bike shorts, but can get uncomfortable sitting in class all day long.

So, in cold weather, pants for the win!

In hot weather, culottes do the trick.  Practically impossible to roll up by the waistband (unless you like having a seam embedded in your crotch all day, and hey, maybe some people do) and equally impossible to roll up the legs.

I know, because all my friends and I tried.



The Ticket Junkies

September 13th, 2011
By Glinda

One of the unexpected pleasures of homeschooling is the ability to schedule playdates on weekdays to places you would normally avoid like the plague on a weekend.

We have a chain here in my part of the state called Boomers, which has an arcade, miniature golf, go-karts, batting cages, and lots of other kiddie fun stuff.  We met another family there last week, and being nine year old boys, they decided to hit the arcade first.

But these arcades are a far cry from the ones of my youth.  Instead of video games to play for the sheer pleasure of playing (after all, kids today have the option to do this all the time at home) they have games that you play solely for tickets.

Yup, stupid little pieces of paper.

But to the Munchkin and his friend, these tiny stubs that multiple trees gave their lives for are the equivalent of gold nuggets.  Each one is to be gloated over, hoarded obsessively in any and all available pockets,  or even better, having too many to hold in your pockets, and finally tallied up when the parental money store has put up the “closed” sign.

And such whining and begging for more chances to play!  Each game is expertly canvassed as to probability of maximum ticket winning.  Now if only they would devote as much attention and time to their schoolwork as to calculating the odds of winning these games!

My son’s playdate companion won something like 80o tickets out of one game, and I recognized the symptoms of seething envy in the Munchkin.  He frantically attempted the game next, only to win something like 12 tickets.

Them’s the breaks, kid.

So off they head to the redemption center.  I’m thinking to myself that our friend is going to get something pretty sweet with his thousand or so tickets.

Silly, old-fashioned Glinda! It turns out to get anything even halfway decent, you had to have at least four thousand tickets.  Four freaking thousand!

It took a minimum of twenty dollars to win that thousand tickets, and I assure you that you could go out and purchase any of those prizes for less than what was spent on playing the games.

I tried to turn this experience into an object lesson about how places such as Boomers are just trying to get as much money out of people as possible.  I went into how much the actual games cost versus how much was spent and…

Yadda, yadda, yadda.

My son had the glazed look of an addict who isn’t ready to hear his intervention team.  He didn’t care what I was saying, he was cradling his Tootsie Rolls, Laffy Taffys, and packages of Fun Dip as if they were the greatest treasures in the world.

You won this round Boomers.

But I promise you won’t win the war.

Mainly because I can’t afford to go back.

 



Monday Teeny Poll

September 12th, 2011
By Glinda

56% of you are out there, somewhere, on the internet but hope that not too many people know about it. 26% of you are letting it all hang out, and 16% say they just don’t put pictures of themselves on the internet.  I’m counting myself among that crowd.  You know, I guess the main reason is that I’m a cynic.  I don’t trust people and I certainly don’t trust sites like Facebook and what have you to keep my pictures private.  Yeah, they are supposed to be addressing some of those privacy issues, but I still don’t believe them.  And I’ve not posted pictures of myself for so long (I’ve been blogging since 2004) that at this point, it is simply sheer stubbornness that keeps me from putting anything up.  I figure if I haven’t done it by now, why start?  And I absolutely do not post pictures of my children, either.  I think I did once, years and years ago, and then took it off three days later.

So this next poll question is a personal one, which is fantastic, as I sort of have you guys as my advisers on an unpaid retainer.  Although for all I know, you are lying through your teeth when you answer these things.

My husband and I will be celebrating our tenth wedding anniversary (although we have been together as a couple for twenty) in November, and I floated to him the idea that I might like to do a very informal, fun renewal of vows.  And, you know, maybe a little party or something to go along with that. Well, I certainly wasn’t expecting the negative reaction I got, and I’m wondering if it is worth it to try and push the issue (because nothing says enduring love like forcing your spouse to do something they don’t want!) or if I should just let it go.

 







Disclaimer: Manolo the Shoeblogger is not Manolo Blahnik

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