I would totally have asked a question of Moonlighting-era Bruce Willis.

Original source: Rookie

I live in what some would term a hoity-toity area.

Lots of very prim and proper yoga-practicin’ ladies with perfect hair and Bugaboo strollers.  They tend to have roughly the same type of hair style, roughly the same clothes, and roughly the same manerisms.  I don’t think most of them actually come from here, but there’s more of them than me.

Erm, it’s safe to say that I don’t really fit in all that well.  I’m a little too opinionated, a little too heavy, and I’ve never been the cookie-cutter type.

The other day I took my kids to the park nearest our house, and it was surprisingly empty.

Oh sure, there was one other mom (or maybe nanny, because she sure was chipper with that little boy) with a boy a bit younger than my daughter, but that was about it other than some people playing on the basketball courts on the other side.

So when my daughter wanted to climb UP the slide instead of going on top of the play equipment in the traditional manner, I let her.  I figured that since there was no one else on the play structure other than her, it wasn’t a big deal.  If there had been other children on the structure, I probably wouldn’t have allowed it.

Anyhoo, up she went on the slippery slide, with my hand hovering protectively over her back, but not touching it because I want her to do it by herself, if possible.  When she reached the top, she slid back down with a happy screech.

The other little boy saw my daughter do this, and asked his mom/nanny if he could go up the slide as well.

“Oh no, honey,” she said in a voice loud enough for me to hear and dripping with something akin to condescension.  “There are RULES about climbing up the slide.  We don’t do things like that.” And she primly took him to an entirely different section of the playground.

I looked around to see where the rules prohibiting slide climbing were posted.

There weren’t any.

I don’t really think of myself as a rebel.  But apparently I am.

Sigh.

72% of you disagree with the name choice of Beyonce and Jay-Z for their daughter.  I’m even more fascinated that they trademarked it, although I guess they don’t want anyone profiting off of their child, which I suppose I can sympathize with.

Today I’m all about education, the kind for kids paid for by taxes, anyway…

Well, Cam Gigandet gave it his best, but wasn’t able to pull past model Gabriel Aubrey.  Sorry, Cam!

Today I’ve got someone who I have greivously omitted in the past.   I just saw 13 Going on 30 for the first time last week, and slapped my forehead with a big d’oh that I’d forgotten this actor existed.  Not to mention he is also in the upcoming Avengers movie.

So, here you are.

VERSUS

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I belong to more “flash sale” sites than is probably healthy, and they have more clothes by far for my toddler girl than my inching-toward-middle-school son.  I look at LOTS of dresses.

Often I will click on a particular brand just to see what they are offering, even if I know I can’t afford it.  Actually, BECAUSE I can’t afford it, I want to see what I’m missing out on by being poor.

So recently, I clicked on a prestigious French brand that is branching out into children’s wear, and read this opening line:

Do right by your little girl and clothe her in Chloé from a young age.

Erm, really?

Because I choose not to spend $180 on a denim jumper she would probably wear twice, I’m doing my daughter wrong?

Anything to make people feel morally superior for spending an inordinate amount of money on kid’s clothing, amirite?

Priorities.

Methinks people have them in the wrong place.

I attended my senior prom with my then-boyfriend, and let me tell you, it sucked.

At my small school, generally only seniors attended prom, and underclassmen were only able to go if they were asked by a senior at our brother school.  Why, I have no idea, but I sort of wish I had gone as a junior because then I might have thought twice about going as a senior.

I had a great dress, six couples shared the cost of a limo, we went to eat at an expensive restaurant before prom (even though we were technically being served a meal at the dance) and unbeknownst to me, my hair looked like hell.  I found this out later when we got our pictures back, and it probably would have ruined my night if I’d known.   Thank you, best friend, for not mentioning it because you knew I would obsess about it all night.

Anyhoo, I think I paid a total of $300 for everything, which included dress, shoes, boutonniere, fake nails, glitter hairspray, (hey, it was the 80′s) and my share of the limo. My parents paid for my dress, I paid for everything else.  My at-the-time boyfriend paid for the tickets, his tux, my corsage, and the dinner.  He probably paid close to $300 as well.

So, a total of around $600 bucks for a night we spent arguing and sitting miserably on a couch in the lobby of the hotel.

This is why it boggles my mind that anyone would pay upwards of a thousand dollars, or even close to two thousand, for one night in high school.

Trust me kids, in the long run, high school means nothing.

I don’t know if my son will still be homeschooled by the time he reaches prom age, but you can bet that I won’t be shelling out anywhere near that amount to send him there.

Two completely suprising (to me, anyway) fruits nabbed the top spots, with raspberries(!) coming in at number two and mangoes(!) coming in at number one.  Seriously, I never saw those coming.  I’ve got nothing against either one, especially in margarita form, but had no idea they were so popular in general.   Bananas came in third, and we had quite the few duking it out in a fourth place tie, including tomatoes, pears, avocadoes, and strawberries.  My personal favorite are tomatoes.  I love them in almost anything, except obviously something dessert-y.

Today I’m completely celeb-centric.

To no one’s great surprise, Cam Gigandet won out over David Schwimmer by a fairly large margin.  Not completely embarassing, but close.

Today I’ve got a babydaddy who is more of a celebrity-by-association, as the mother of his child is world famous.  But the man can sure wear a suit.  Good job, Halle, in ensuring his genetic material will live on. Although a definite sad face for their ongoing custody battles.

VERSUS