A 14 pound baby boy was recently delivered naturally and without an epidural in Iowa.

Ouch.

My own baby-chute cringes in sympathy.

Did I really just call it a baby-chute? Impressive what the lack of sleep can do for your vocabulary.

And I didn’t even give birth naturally, but had two C-sections.  Aaaaand, even if I hadn’t had the C-sections, both of my children were roughly half the weight of young Asher.

A good friend of mine had to deliver her second child without an epidural because her labor progressed more quickly than she realized, and she admitted that it was indeed the worst pain imaginable.  That was with a nine pound baby.  Add five more and you’ve got to have some major endorphin rush happening just to stay conscious.

Listen, y’all. I DO NOT know where the days go. One day it’s Friday and the next day it is Monday and I haven’t done what I’m supposed to do. I promise it will get better.

56% of you are very self-reflective in answering that you very well might be a snob.  Which, to be honest, means you probably are.  Not that I love you any less, of course.  21% vehemently deny the accusation, while 8% answer with an overhwhelming affirmative.  The rest of you refused to answer of the grounds of self-incrimination, and that also means that you are a snob, without question.

I would say that I am for some things, and not for others, if that makes any sense.  There are things that many people care about very deeply that I couldn’t give two figs about, and there are things that I think are important that nobody thinks of twice.  So I guess that means yes.

A school in Pennsylvania recently banned Uggs during school hours.  Not because of their blinding ugliness, but because they were being used to store contraband such as cell phones.

Aloha, Pierce Brosnan, may you comfortably ensconce yourself up in the CDF Hall of Fame.

I know, I know.  I have been a slacker, especially when it came to Thursday nights and CDF.  You see, for some strange reason, I found it daunting to have to find two brand new celebrity dads to feature here.  I have no idea why, there are an infinite number of things that are more daunting, yet I didn’t do it.

I have an eclectic pair of contestants for you today.

Don’t say I didn’t warn you.  One might be best known for his live-action Scooby Doo movies and the other is an award-winning actor with an Oscar nomination.

VERSUS

The United States has the highest teen birthrate of any developed country.

I’m sorry, but that’s inexcusable.

I’m going to lay a lot of the blame at the feet of the woefully inadequate “abstinence-only” programs that are basically a waste of everyone’s time and money.

Teenagers have sex.

Get used to it.

Give them all the tools they will need, including access to birth control, knowledge of sexually transmitted diseases, and you’ve got a pretty good shot at keeping someone from getting pregnant.

In the article linked to above, a quarter of the teens said that their partner did not want them to use birth control.  Say what?

Teach your kids that if their partner doesn’t want them to use birth control, then that partner isn’t worth being with.

Humans are sexual beings.  That includes teenagers.  That ESPECIALLY includes teenagers.  It’s like nobody ever remembers being a teenager.

What is wrong with people, anyway?

I think I have called my daughter by her actual name less than twenty times in her entire (albeit so far brief) life.

I have a couple of nicknames, with one in particular being heavily used, and it isn’t a play on her name at all.

This is partly because I realize that the name we chose for her does not really fit her at all.  That is something I have no idea how to fix, and I blame my husband because I wanted to name her something that would have TOTALLY fit her personality but he vetoed it for NO GOOD REASON.  He says we can change her name and she would never know the difference, but that just seems wrong.

The problem is that when her relatives call her by her name and she doesn’t respond, they tend to get a worried look on their faces.   They ask me if she has a hearing problem, and does she always ignore people like that?  Well, yes she actually does ignore people like that, but it has nothing to do with her hearing.

I never really called the Munchkin by his real name either, though, and he seems to know what his name is.

Most of the time.

You know, I feel like we are friends.  I’ve been writing on Teeny Manolo for quite a long time now, and I know all you regular commenters as if you were my real life coffee-klatsch.  Well, I don’t drink coffee, so how about tea-klatsch, if there is indeed such a thing.

So please, allow me, for just a second, to complain. And perhaps you will get a better understanding of why my posting has been all over the map lately, for which I sincerely apologize.

1) In less than two weeks, I will undergo a partial thyroidectomy to remove one half of my thyroid gland in order for them to biopsy a suspicious growth.  If it comes back cancerous, I’m to return in less than a week from the original surgery date and have the other half removed, then undergo some radiation.

2) Recent economic developments in the state of California have led to a salary and benefits decrease (in the space of about a month and a half) for my husband, which in turn leads us to not being able to afford to stay in our current place and still have any money left over.  Not destitute, but quite a bit less coming in.

3) Thus, we are moving in next door to my parents, into a house they own and have owned for years.

4) However, the house is in a state of complete disrepair and needs to have lots of remodeling done, thus leading to me being in charge of a $50,000+ renovation project.  Which is fine, just a lot of work and research.

5) Have I mentioned my daughter doesn’t believe in sleeping at night?

Combine all of that and you have one tired, stressed, and worn out Glinda.   Don’t get me wrong, I am blessed in so many ways that I have a hard time being upset about any of it, it’s just a lot on my plate at one time.

/complaining.

The county where I currently live, and have for the past ten years, is known for being rich and snobby.  I am neither.  But tell me…

PS The general consensus on the monster stickers was that they were cute!

I can’t even rely on my nine year old to find a pair of socks in his sock drawer, much less keep an eye out to protect my multimillion dollar illegal operation.

I can’t remember if I was at the doctor’s office filling out my daughter’s two year checkup questionnaire or if I was reading something on the internet, but whatever it was, it indicated that time-outs were not appropriate for toddlers.

Say what?

Honestly, if I didn’t use a time out for my daughter, she would probably have hurt herself doing something she wasn’t supposed to do.  Simply telling her does not cut it, and I refuse to hit.  She is an envelope pusher (please, may that trait serve her well later in life) and if I don’t have SOMETHING to resort to as a punishment, my life would be more of a living hell than it already is.

Because even the time out doesn’t always work, and once I threaten one, I am extremely consistent about following up.  I give her warnings and don’t jump straight to the time out, but in cases like the one where she tries to climb up our entertainment center to touch the television, they are used immediately.   I only use time outs when she is going to hurt herself in some way or has hurt someone else in some way, such as the time when she was very into punching her brother in the private area.  Sorry, not going to be tolerated and I don’t see any other recourse.  I take her physically away from whatever is going on, sit her with me, and tell her why she has to sit with me.  I don’t keep her that long, but I think my message comes across.

I didn’t have to use time outs for the Munchkin until much later in his life, definitely after three.  He was a completely different type of child, so much that it makes my head spin to think about it.  But like all kids, he has his own special brand of misbehaving.

Oddly enough, I remember that the article didn’t really have any other options for discipline other than distraction.  Let me tell you, once they get to a certain age, distraction doesn’t work.

Unless of course, the distraction is a time out.

I apologize.

I will do my durndest to keep up with the pace I’ve been churning out now for going on five years.  You’d think I’d have it down to a science by now.

I spotted these courtesy of Boing Boing: