I was waiting for it. It was just a matter of time. The notice finally came home with my son last week.
Dear Parents, it read, due to the large number of birthday parties in which foods like cupcakes and donuts are brought to class, combined with the food allergies some of the children have, we are now forbidding junk food at the school. We are just trying to keep your kids healthy, because healthy kids make better learners, blabbity blabbity blaaah.
Even though I have noticed not a smidgen of a weight problem at our school, (I think the allergy reference is a red herring, because they know it would be beyond politically incorrect for parents to call the school and say, “Screw the kids with food allergies, my son deserves a cupcake on his birthday!”) they’ve gone and done it.
They have now started being the food police.
The area in which I live is filled rather to the brim with trim, wealthy, older moms who forbid their children to drink anything but water at lunch. Or to have anything unhealthier than goldfish. I’m not kidding, a friend of mine is exactly like that. She could not even bring herself to allow her son to have any junk food at his birthday party, and served a bunch of eight year olds grapes and tomato and mozzarella salad. At a birthday party. Now, I am certainly not one who advocates eating junk food on a daily basis, but if you can’t let go a little at a birthday party, there might be some issues that go beyond “committed to a healthy lifestyle.” This is the same child, who, when not with his mother, takes every opportunity he gets to ingest as much sugar as possible. Meanwhile, my son, who is definitely allowed leeway in the junk food area, will choose the healthier option about 80% of the time.
So even though I’m not a libertarian at heart, I’m chafing at the rules the school has decided to impose.
And just to spite them, I’m packing Halloween candy in my son’s lunch every day this week. And maybe the next.
Disgruntled snort sound here.