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Archive for April 30th, 2009

The Bad Mommy Chronicles

Thursday, April 30th, 2009
By Glinda


I’m sure you’ve heard from many that motherhood is not all unbearably sweet moments, ultimate satisfaction, and unbridled love 24/7.

They would be absolutely right.

There are times when you take a deep breath, look up at the sky, and beseech the deity of your choice for a teensy bit of patience, or you swear to Them, you are going to pack it up and find a nice sandy beach somewhere.

It has happened to me more than once. I know, I know, you are shocked, shocked! How could Glinda be anything but the perfect mother? Take a moment to compose yourself. I’ll wait.

In fact, I have even gone so far as to call my son an unflattering noun, although not to his face.

You see, when the Munchkin gets upset, he goes into his room. Which is fine by me, because that way both of us get some time to cool off.

Eventually, I will go into his room and he will be otherwise occupied by Legos and such, and we can talk about whatever the issue is in a more calm and rational fashion. Sometimes it’s easier to get your point across when your verbal partner isn’t sobbing and/or red in the face.

Except this time, he blockaded his door, and even built a booby trap to boot. Luckily for me, (or for him, depending on your view) said booby trap failed to execute properly and instead launched in the opposite direction.

That is when I shut the door and muttered under my breath, “You little punk.”

I happen to think that it is a rather healthy thing, actually, to call a spade a spade. I would be perhaps a little dismayed to hear about a parent who thought their kid was an angel who could do no wrong.

And then I would make sure to stay as far away from them and their offspring as humanly possible.

Are Pregnant Women Indeed Smug?

Thursday, April 30th, 2009
By Glinda

These two ladies are very cute indeed, and while they have some not-so-kind things to say about pregnant women, I’ll take this video with a grain of salt.

I do have to agree with this duo of “Garfunkel and Oates” that there are indeed some very smug pregnant women out there. It also drives me crazy when people say, “Oh, we have a name picked out, but we’re not telling.” Why not? If you have it picked out, then why in the world would you be keeping it a secret. A friend of mine who pulled this stunt told me that it was because she didn’t want to hear anyone saying something bad about the name. As in, “Jean? Ohmigod, I went to school with a girl named Jean and she never ever washed her clothes!” But, they might say that anyway afterwards, and if you like the name, then what do you care about someone else’s negative name associations? Because NOBODY is immune form the negative name associations.

And listen, is it wrong to be happy that you are pregnant? Although I do have to say that throughout my pregnancy with the Munchkin, the overwhelming feeling I had most of the time was panic.

I have a bone to pick with them on the “all I want is a healthy baby” reply. Why is that so hard to fathom? That little section of the video is the only part I think is in poor taste. I think that “healthy” pretty much means I don’t want my child to be limbless.

What say you, residents of the off again/on again Manolosphere? Are pregnant women smug? There are a couple of curse words that might make you want to think twice about viewing at work.

(somehow the previous post on this was deleted, and the comments mysteriously went over to raincoaster’s “Irish Bull” post, so I’m just chalking it up to weirdness)

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