Adolf Hitler Captured!
By raincoaster
Not a conspiracy theory, honest! And nothing to do with Elvis as far as I can see, although there’s probably a cousin of that name out on a limb of the family tree, I’m guessing.
In a shocking example of karma missing its mark, Adolf Hitler Campbell, the adorable three-year-old who became internationally (in)famous when a grocery store refused to put his name on the birthday cake his parents ordered, has been seized by child welfare authorities, along with his sisters JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell and Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell.
Now, it’s undoubtably both true and A! GOOD! THING! that, as the father says:
“This is America. They say it’s free. You have a right to name your child what you want to name your child. “
It is, however, true that people will look upon the choices you’ve made and judge you for them. Unfortunately, because he didn’t change his OWN name but bestowed this super-special favorite name on his child, the child will be the one to suffer for it. The very Scottishly-named Heath Campbell claims he picked the name and bestowed it on his ginger son to honor his German heritage.
Note that police say there have been no reports of abuse, and nobody is actually saying why the children were taken into custody. Although perhaps as an act of humanitarian nomenclature intervention?
“Part of it is the infantile nature of the parents’ behavior,” Berrill said. “You can name your dog something weird, but they think they’re making some kind of bold statement with the children, not appreciating that the children will have separate lives and will be looked at in a negative light until they’re able to change their name. It is abuse.”
January 15th, 2009 at 1:20 pm
This reminds me of that story from New Zealand where a little girl was made ward of the court because her parents had named her “Tallulah Does The Hula” — as a FIRST NAME.
(And you know they insisted on calling her that whole thing all the time because even at 8 years old she was trying to go by Annie or some such at school.)
Although I have to say, the parents in this story sound much less like hippy-dippy-aren’t-we-clever people, and more like scary-freaky-don’t-leave-your-dog-with-them people…
January 16th, 2009 at 7:18 am
Now, Tallulah by itself is rather a jazzy name. But if you have the urge to get that creative with nomenclature, I don’t think it’s unrealistic to expect you to experiment on yourself first.
BTW did you know that Oprah was supposed to be named Orpah, which is a Biblical name, but the nurses got it wrong on the form and her mother couldn’t be bothered to correct it?
January 16th, 2009 at 2:38 pm
I agree that if you want to be all anti-establishment, you should change your own damn name instead of saddling your unsuspecting child with the name of a mass murderer.
And mini_pixie, I wrote about the parents of poor Tallulah, and gave them a Lazy Parenting Award. But the above couple seem to be disturbed rather than just clueless.