I asked you last week what your favorite part of Thanksgiving was, and I was of one mind with the forty three percent who answered, “The food!” A relative of mine from out of state makes these killer pecan tarts that are to die for, and she only makes them at Thanksgiving. I anticipate eating them months in advance. Is it wrong of me to like them so much?

As for this week, we move along to the holiday season, which is fast approaching. Just a little over three weeks separates us from both Christmas and Hanukkah, which just doesn’t seem like enough time.

Jennie’s a regular around the Manolosphere, and so when she posted this comment I felt no problem stealing it, even though it was posted over at Ayyyy. I’m sure Spirit Fingers won’t mind!

Jennie Says:
November 29th, 2008 at 10:16 pm

Black Friday Indeed! I have enough stuff. My friends, my family, all have enough stuff. The holidays have lost so much of their flavor because of the obsessive need for more stuff. A man has died so people could get more stuff.

I have told all those near and dear that I am not giving anymore stuff to clutter their lives. They have my love, respect, and affection. What I am going to do for them is to make a child living in poverty believe in the Holiday spirits again in their name. I’m adopting a family and I encourage all of you to do the same. My local radio station works with the police & fire department to identify children that wouldn’t have a happy holiday. I usually adopt a brother and sister and get the items on their list and then a ton of stuff from the dollar store (when I was little it was all about opening presents). I then get Mommy a present “from the kids”. It gives someone that doesn’t have stuff a Merry Christmas/Chanukkah/Ramadan/Kwanza etc… and doesn’t add to the piles of stuff we have. Not only that, but I don’t have to murder anyone have a fulfilling holiday.

And what shall we get Jennie for her comment of excessive superfantasticality? How about this:

A link to the search results for “Sponsor a Family” in your area?

Let us sing now the praises of the nap. Surely there is no endeavor more restorative, and it is blissfully free, equal-opportunity, and accessible.

You know what that means: someone’s figured out a way to package and sell it.

We present for your perusal two different napping services: one we like, one we do not. No sir, we don’t. See if you can guess which is which.

Exhibit A: The Rest Suite

This award-winning spa has a novel way to separate sleep-deprived travellers from their excess cash: they charge a dollar a minute for a “Rest Suite” which includes aromatherapy scents, an eye pillow, and a place to lie down. This makes the YVR Absolute Spa Rest Suite one of the most expensive hotel rooms in the city, at $1440 per day. Let’s hope you don’t sleep through you wakeup call; you might have to remortgage!

Exhibit B: NapSounds

NapSounds is a novel update of the old “Learn Self-Improvement In Your Sleep” tapes that every Dale Carnegie wannabe bought back in the 70’s. A deep, soothing, positively narcoleptic male voice informs you that you are special and taking time for yourself is a good thing and that this 20-minute nap will bring you the energy to power you through the rest of your day. Suggested donation: ten cents per nap.

Neuro-Linguistic Programming is used in the text, binaural beats induce relaxation state and a smooth overall mix enables you to relax quickly and efficiently by feeling natural, peaceful and free.

I had to shut it off two minutes in, though, because I was getting drowsy.