10 Things I Can’t Live Without “AC”
By Glinda
“After Children” of course!
I promised I would give you a bookend to last week’s post, and if I’m anything, I’m a woman of my word. And I’ll be honest with you, there are way more than ten things for this list, I actually had a hard time whittling it down.
1. Watching them sleep. I’ve been doing it since he was a baby, and I don’t think it will ever get old.
2. The hugs and kisses. Oy, the hugs and the kisses! Granted, I may be in for a bit of a dry spell in a few years when it is just not cool to hug your mom, but you never know. Besides, it will just be a phase.
3. Taking pride in their accomplishments. Never mind that none of them are really a direct reflection upon me, I can’t but help wonder at how wonderful my son is.
4. Seeing him at play. Watching as he manages to navigate his way through the world, sorting things through by himself and with friends.
5. Having that extra viewpoint in my life. There is something so very special about each child and the different perspective they bring. Whether it be an observation about the teacher or about my own behavior, there’s always a new revelation. Kids do indeed say the darndest things!
6. Teaching. Teaching him everything I know about everything. And Googling it if I don’t.
7. Doing things together as a family. Just hanging out or going on a vacation, it’s all good.
8. The hope and promise that you can’t help but see in your child.
9. The fights. Believe it or not, I often have a hard time not giggling when my son is arguing with me. He is just so cute and he tries to be so logical, it’s sort of adorable. Don’t quote me on this when he’s 14, though.
10. Seeing him become his own person. Because that’s what parenting is all about, isn’t it?
Your turn!
November 19th, 2008 at 11:10 am
Rediscovering how to live in the moment, and seeing everything again for the first time.
November 20th, 2008 at 12:14 am
1) Getting stressed by people whose level of uselessness is surpassed only by their own estimation of their importance, looking into my daughter’s eyes, and forgetting these obtuse pieces of flotsam exist
2) Seeing single 30-somethings going out every night and wondering “Aren’t you a little old to be acting like a college kid and not getting a real life?”
3) The little sigh at the end of her yawn.
4) That sort of gargling sound she makes when she’s happy and talkative that sounds vaguely like a lizard.
5) The giant smile she gets when she sees me.
6) The way she looks at me when she cries and I give her the bottle
7) Hearing her cry and being able to calm her just by holding her and talking to her.
8) The realization that just 3 months ago, life didn’t seem nearly as purposeful.
November 20th, 2008 at 9:34 am
Watching my two kids develop a relationship with each other that is wholly outside their relationship with me or my hubby. It always makes me go all gooey to see them hug or kiss each other.
November 20th, 2008 at 2:58 pm
Others:
1. my daughter’s giggle
2. watching my husband and daughter together when they don’t know i’m looking
3. making pancakes with her every saturday morning, like my mom did for us
November 21st, 2008 at 1:40 pm
I don’t think that’s really a fair statement. If someone is childless or child-free but is happy and fulfilled with their life, then they DO have a “real life”, and their life is no better or worse than yours.
November 21st, 2008 at 5:45 pm
Word, La Petite Acadienne. ObiWandreas, aren’t you a little old to be judging people’s worth on how similar to you they are?
November 21st, 2008 at 7:35 pm
Well, people’s true worth is measured in their ability to breed, isn’t it?
November 22nd, 2008 at 1:37 am
Well now, some people call those of us with kids “breeders” so there is a lot of miscommunication on both sides of the aisle.
November 22nd, 2008 at 4:06 am
No, no, “breeders” are just heterosexuals. You don’t have to produce proof. Simply having matching LL Bean jackets is usually enough.
November 22nd, 2008 at 4:10 am
No, not the gay community. There is a whole other subset of childless people (by choice) who look down on people with kids. Especially ones they don’t think should be having them.
November 22nd, 2008 at 4:17 am
Yeah, but if we didn’t look down on Britney, we wouldn’t be human, would we?
November 22nd, 2008 at 9:39 am
No, Glinda has a point. Both sides do it. And it’s silly, frankly. If people are happy and fulfilled with their life choices, then other people just need to mind their own beeswax and focus on their own lives.
It’s when people become smug and superior about their own life choices, whatever they may be, that those divides are deepened.
I’ve met smug singletons who look down on “boring old married people”, smug marrieds who don’t even try to disguise their pity for their single friends, and smug parents who think that all childless people are lazy gadabouts with no purpose in life. It’s senseless, and we should all remind ourselves to try to not be part of the problem.
November 23rd, 2008 at 10:43 am
It’s amazing how many people got snarky about that comment without actually understanding what was written. I guess in any emotional discussion, people read what they want to read, not what was actually written.
You’ll notice that nowhere in #2 is there any actual reference to children, or even marriage. The only comment is about people who spend every night partying. Whether you have a family, or simply a demanding, fulfilling career, there will be neither the time nor the energy for nightly partying unless it is actually part of your job.
I also wonder what someone who would apply a term to children which is more applicable to cattle is doing on a blog about parenting and childhood.
November 24th, 2008 at 8:49 am
Snarking, obviously. And getting paid for it.
You’re right that your comment didn’t single out childless people for comment. It looked down on many more people than that. If you don’t want to encounter snark on the blogs, perhaps you should try to offend fewer people in the first place.
Those who are single and in all age brackets like to spend time with their friends. It shouldn’t be necessary to anyone’s sense of fulfillment to look down on those people, should it?
November 24th, 2008 at 2:05 pm
Maybe so, maybe not. But my original argument still stands. If someone’s lifestyle does involve going out every single night, and if they are happy and fulfilled with that, then that IS a real life, and those people don’t need to be pitied or looked upon with contempt.
November 24th, 2008 at 6:13 pm
So when I need my Tums my 3 yr old daughter likes to feed them to me, which is her way of taking care of Mommy, which is all very cute. Sometimes I have just put lotion on her hands or she has just washed them and then I say “Ewww that tasted like lotion/soap!” and we have a round of the silly giggles. Last week she fed me a Tums and as I was chewing she looked at me with her big innocent brown eyes and said:
Mommy, did it taste like snot?
My husband laughed so hard he had to leave the room.
A non-sequitur to the current comment thread, true, but a reflection upon life “AC” nonetheless…
November 24th, 2008 at 7:59 pm
Actually, ObiWandreas, what was written was a comment about things you can’t live without, after children. Partying singles’ lives are not real, but yours is. Now that you’ve had children. I think your meaning is pretty clear. I’m glad your life has purpose now. Mine always has.
Glinda, you have a point. Some people do call people with kids “breeders.” But nobody here did. So your point is as empty and meaningless as a single’s endless partying.
November 24th, 2008 at 11:23 pm
A lot of people divorce after their kids move out, SO THERE GOES THE BLISS ARGUMENT. I am a parent so I know the joy. I also have a lot of single and a lot of gay friends who are F!@@#$ happy. In fact this blog entry could have been about having money too. I know happy people who love life who are in most peoples terms broke. Obi-Wandreas seems to have posted just to stir comments.
Some of the greatest moments of my life were single. I ventured to Africa, Asia, and made friends, had experiences, helped people. This formed my character, probably makes me a good Dad. BUT PARENTING IS A SMALL PART OF THE EQUATION.
November 25th, 2008 at 5:41 pm
@cari- I’m thinking that taking the time to tell someone that they have a point, but that point is empty and meaningless is a fairly empty and meaningless endeavor itself.
@Shane- I hear you, but if you look at our tagline, this blog is about “The Joys of Childhood and Parenting!” I don’t think anyone was saying, or would say, that a single and/or childless person’s life has no meaning or rewards.