The Cons of Having an Only Child
By Glinda
Having already examined the pros of having an only child, now comes the flip side.
1. There is no opportunity to learn that toys are community property.
2. Mommy is supposed to be available to play with on demand.
3. They think the entire world revolves around them.
4. They will never have a sibling to commiserate with about how much their parents suck.
5. Only one wedding! Or should that be a pro?
6. Things should be done their way, which is the only way, and the right way, of course.
7. Possibly a bit too much exposure to adult conversations.
8. No convenient target to torment. Except maybe Mom.
9. I’ll never have a built-in babysitter.
10. No bunkbed necessary. I kind of like bunkbeds.
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July 2nd, 2008 at 8:14 am
One of the reasons I was so glad that Harry came along so soon after Evan was that I was not longer the one that had to entertain Evan. It was great when Harry got old enough that they could play together.
July 2nd, 2008 at 10:45 am
Also: caring for elderly parents is hard when the duties all descend on one child. This can be alleviated, however, by only child having multiple children who can help with grandma. (I say this as a daughter-in-law of an only child, who put in my time feeding, dressing, medicating and tending grandma, and who was there when she passed away.)
July 2nd, 2008 at 11:40 am
The reason I had two children was because it was so hard when my own dad died. It was just me and my mom left (all our extended family lives in other states). My mother was, of course, devestated by the loss of her husband, thus the burden was large. I had no siblings to share the burden with.
July 2nd, 2008 at 12:09 pm
You’re forgetting that all only children have scales underneath their clothing and tend to get pitying looks from people when their birth-order status is revealed.
What, me bitter?
July 2nd, 2008 at 12:20 pm
Well, you know, it isn’t for lack of trying. I had a miscarriage last year, and I also have an autoimmune disorder that is making it very difficult to even conceive. 🙁
I guess I’m lucky to even have the one I have.
July 2nd, 2008 at 12:24 pm
I’m so sorry to hear about your miscarriage. I had one about three years ago, and until then I never realized exactly how painful it is to lose a child so early — not helped, of course, by the unconsciously cruel things people say by way of consolation.
July 2nd, 2008 at 12:34 pm
mrsdarwin- Thank you, and I am sorry for yours. I told my husband that it is an experience I wouldn’t even wish upon my worst enemy. I think you are correct, there is no way to understand how bad it is unless you have had one yourself.
July 2nd, 2008 at 1:20 pm
FWIW, you can still get the Munchkin bunkbeds! He will be delighted with having to choose which bed to sleep in every night, and you will always have a spare in his room for his sleepovers. Plus, it’s fun to lay on one bed while he’s on the other and just look up at the ceiling and talk about stuff.
July 2nd, 2008 at 4:14 pm
Speaking as an only child (please note that my last comment was heavy on the sarcasm, with a Bridget Jones reference) I truly enjoyed my upbringing. My parents were very thoughtful to avoid having me falling into the stereotypical “only child” traps. I was (and am) an extremely happy person and because I don’t know what it’s like to have a sibling, I don’t miss one.
I wish you luck in coping with your miscarriage. My heart breaks for anyone dealing with that experience.
Oh, and there’s one more pro- chances are that your lovely little Munchkin will be an independent person as he gets older.
July 2nd, 2008 at 6:51 pm
The Annalucia is grieved to hear of the Glinda’s miscarriage – her own Eldest Daughter has suffered two of them. (She does have one little son, the incomparable Daniele.) Truly the Mother Nature can be a nasty uncooperative beeyotch when she so desires.
To the Emily: Scales? (???)
July 3rd, 2008 at 6:32 pm
MrsDarwin, you have addressed one of my worst fears. My husband and I are both only children–and only children of older parents, at that. When we are in our forties, our parents will be in their eighties, and our own children will still be too young to help with their grandparents’ care. Probably at least one of my half-sisters will help care for my dad, but my mother will be solely my responsibility.