May 14, 2008 | Teeny Manolo

Archive for May 14th, 2008

Miley Cyrus will drink your milkshake!

Wednesday, May 14th, 2008
By raincoaster

Miley Cyrus will drink your milkshake

Oh, girl. Just. Stop.

Baby Fiends

Wednesday, May 14th, 2008
By Glinda


I’m just not a baby person.

I’m cool with babies and all, but I am not one of those women who will drop everything to rush over to an infant. I don’t normally coo and cuddle someone else’s child, unless I am related to or good friends with the parents.

I remember taking the Munchkin out when he was about six months to get our taxes done. The secretary saw him and immediately squealed, lurching out from behind her desk, begging to hold him. Granted, he was one cute baby, but I was a bit nonplussed that this woman, this stranger, was practically salivating at the thought of cradling him.

Since her boss was the one who was going to be saving us some money, I reluctantly allowed her. Her face suffused with joy, and she said, “I can’t help it, I am totally baby crazy. I just looooove babies.”

And when the Munchkin was young, I came across many of these women. Seemingly normal, but if their radar picked up an infant within twenty feet, their eyes would glaze over and their minds became slightly unhinged. Once that baby hit their arms, they could no longer communicate properly with the outside world. Syllables became drawn out, and nonsensical babbling/singing would come out of their mouths. There was nothing else but this infant and their momentary bond. Which is touchingly sweet, and yet is at the same time a wee bit creepy.

I sort of get it. There is something so very adorable about newborns. Those little lips! Those big eyes! The cute noises! And the helplessness! Who can resist the helplessness?

Well, I can.

I think I am happier now that my son and I can have a conversation, that he can brush his own teeth, and that diapers are a thing of the distant, distant past.

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