I Guess My Mom Thought I Was an Idiot
By Glinda
If you grew up in the seventies, then chances are you had a Garanimals outfit. I’m not ashamed to admit that I owned more than a few myself. Er, well, perhaps I should be, but there it is.
If you were not part of our exclusive Garanimals club, allow me to explain the concept. Garanimals took the children’s fashion world by storm when they introduced the concept of a matching system. By having labels, usually some sort of jungle animal, kids would be able to dress themselves by simply making sure that the labels were the same for both top and bottom. If you had two bears, your outfit was a surefire winner! There was no way you could walk out of the house in an unmatched outfit and embarass your mom! So, a supposedly idiot-proof system.
Why this concept has not been introduced for men, I am not sure. But, that is entirely a different post probably better suited to a different blog.
But really, isn’t being able to dress batshit-crazy some sort of three year old birthright? At that age, it is downright adorable to go grocery shopping wearing an orange striped shirt, red shorts, and a superman cape. Kids should dress like that as often as they can, because that window of opportunity gets slammed shut around the age of seven or so. At that point, the child will either be seen as destined for fashion greatness or someone who will never get invited to birthday parties.
Apparently the makers of Garanimals decided that a couple decades of freestyle dressing by America’s youth was too much for them to handle. They re-launched the brand in February of 2008, available exclusively at WalMart. Which sort of explains why I didn’t know about it until now.
So once again, children have the opportunity to match zebra to zebra and elephant to elephant! Forget about actually teaching them how to put clothes together, let’s have some faceless corporation do all the hard work for us! But according to Dr. Joyce Brothers, “Garanimals…helps the pre-schooler to handle his/her own wardrobe.” Remember Dr. Joyce Brothers? I thought not. Nothing like trotting out an almost thirty year old quote to inspire brand confidence!
May 7th, 2008 at 4:27 pm
Garanamals were geniosity! You could still dress like a nut, if you knew say, that the hippo and the panda clashed. But from the company’s perspective, it was brilliant because it taught kids that their clothes had to be coordinated and they had to buy from the same brand or they’d go wrong…
May 7th, 2008 at 6:19 pm
They may match, but the clothing is still ugly. I saw it recently at walmart and was very unimpressed.
May 7th, 2008 at 6:45 pm
There are some days when I find myself in need of a zebra or hippo to tell me what to wear…
May 7th, 2008 at 8:47 pm
I jokingly call some of my more simple matching pieces my “garanimal outfits.” Those that are in my age bracket find it funny, the younger ones just think I’m crazy as well as a not too snazzy dresser.
And I agree…..as I wander cluelessly and hopelessly through the plethora of bewildering choices in the store, I wish I could find some little tag that would simplify my life.
May 8th, 2008 at 9:19 am
I say it’s definitely a birthright. There’s nothing I like more than seeing a toddler wearing a sweat suit with a tutu and great big snow boots in March because you know she (or he!) dressed themselves. Parents who want kids to be all matchy when it’s not grandma’s birthday or Christmas are too dang uptight.
May 8th, 2008 at 12:38 pm
I agree, NtB – I think it’s adorable when kids dress themselves in the wackiest combos. As long as they’re dressed appropriately for the weather, why not let them have free rein?
May 8th, 2008 at 9:20 pm
Even as a small child I had no use for Garanimals. My tiny fashionista self cared not for the pedestrian designs and insistance on avoiding miscegination in the animal kingdom. Then again, I was lucky enough to have a mother who was a hell of a seamstress and who realized very early on that I had no intention of wearing anything I didn’t personally approve of. The result was that I had a hand in designing my own wardrobe from the time I was old enough to say more than ‘no’ when faced with a piece of clothing I disliked. Each year as I learned more, I had more autonomy over the choices of fabric, pattern, and notions. It got me teased on the playground, but I wouldn’t have had it any other way.
To this day I march to my own very individual percussion section, clothing-wise, but I never, ever doubt my sartorial choices. And I still own some batshit crazy – but awesomely glorious – outfits.
Every child should have the chance to dress like a total mooncalf. It adds a touch of the unexpected to life and allows them to learn what they truly do and don’t like. If we spoonfeed them everything, they have no reason to explore and learn and grow. Let children dress themselves. As long as they don’t try to go out in the snow wearing nothing but a pair of underpants and a Burger King crown, chances are it won’t do anyone any harm, and it will help them develop their sense of self in a big way.
May 9th, 2008 at 11:09 am
So Twistie raises a question I’d love to hear y’all’s thoughts on:
Is a good sense of fashion innate, or acquired? Nature vs nurture? I ask because I sometimes feel whatever nascent fashion sense I may have had was squished in childhood–can’t count the number of times I had no option but to wear the detestable white blouse with puffy sleeves and bows and skirts that were always, always, hemmed at the knee. (I wanted ankle-length). By the time I was allowed to choose my own clothes I was no longer particularly interested, and now I’m afraid I qualify for “fashion-impaired.” But I have come to accept that.
Now I have a 3 yr old girl. How do I help her develop a sense of dressing well? Not trendy, not expensive, certainly not trashy, just an appreciation of presenting herself well and expressing her personality through her style? Thoughts?
May 9th, 2008 at 3:50 pm
Acquired. But the interest is innate, and if you haven’t got it, no matter what your mad skillz, you can’t be bothered to use them most of the time.