Monday Teeny Poll
By Glinda
Well, you guys sure are better than me. Last week’s poll about candy rationing found that a full forty four percent of you dole it all out over time. Eighteen percent give out a portion of the candy, then find somewhere else to put it, whether it be the candy bowl at work or the trash can. I find myself eating more of it than I should, then throwing most of it out in a fit of pique that there isn’t more chocolate.
There is no doubt our society places a premium on looks. It seems that at a younger and younger age, girls are beginning to notice their looks and some of them decide that they don’t measure up.
March 31st, 2008 at 8:46 am
I think people are too quick to blame pop culture, the media, etc. for this. And maybe some of that blame is merited. But don’t forget to look at home–many times these girls have mothers who are obsessed with looking young and perfect. If you obsess about your weight and your lips and your boobs, moms, your daughters will, too. If you want to raise a confident kid, learn to be happy with who you are.
Mothers, be good to your daughters.
March 31st, 2008 at 10:52 am
I absolutely hate the idea of plastic surgery for teens unless it’s for a reconstructive reason.
That said, we are going to let our 13 year old have her moustache lasered off sometime this year.
Because, well, it’s a moustache.
March 31st, 2008 at 10:53 am
Mixed response here.
On the one hand, I am appalled at the thought of boob jobs and surgical body sculpting for the very young.
On the other hand, a girl (or boy) whose identity is being shaped by her/his extraordinary nose or ears should not be condemned for seeking a change.
March 31st, 2008 at 11:20 am
I had a friend who was ashamed of her somewhat large breasts when she was about 14. She asked her mother about breast reduction surgery, and her mother was absolutely appalled and said no. That girl is now rather happy that her mother didn’t acquiesce–she grew a little more, and her breasts now look proportionate to the rest of her.
I did know a girl who had her ears pinned back when she was 13, but like gamma I think that can be a good thing. There was no way she would ever grow into her ears, and her classmates called her mean names all the time.
Spring–good luck to your daughter for her laser hair removal. I have facial hair problems too, so I sympathize. Sadly the series of laser treatments I had when I was 18 didn’t solve the problem for me.
March 31st, 2008 at 1:30 pm
I am absolutely against teens having enhancement surgeries. If they have persistant problems once they reach adulthood, then by all means, they should look into it.
Reconstruction to fix scarring or other problems is a different story.
March 31st, 2008 at 2:35 pm
My experience was the opposite. I was 16, and my breasts were beyond the point of “somewhat large.” My mother was supportive and understanding of my wish to have them reduced. (I wore a size 10 pant but had a G-cup bra).
On my frame, breasts that large were more than an aesthetic problem. They were pulling my shoulders forward and deforming the curvature of my back. I had constant headaches from the pressure of the straps on my shoulders and the pulling on my upper back. I had rashes underneath my breasts and had a hard time finding a comfortable sleeping position.
What I remember more, though, was the emotional agony — never being able to find clothes that fit, receiving the “wrong” kind of attention from boys, having to drop out of basketball and soccer because they just didn’t make sports bras in my size, trying to find a bathing suit and leaving empty-handed, in tears. Getting that reduction didn’t change who I was, or what I thought about myself in general, but it freed me from a very real physical and emotional burden.
As far as plastic surgery goes, I would be against it in a teen if it’s purely for aesthetic reasons. But, if it’s affecting their health, or if they are going through emotional hell, like I was, then I would absolutely be supportive.
March 31st, 2008 at 2:38 pm
Hm…my comment got swallowed. Is it in the spam, Glinda? It was a long comment, and I’m lazy, so I dont’ want to write it again if I don’t have to. 🙂
March 31st, 2008 at 6:06 pm
Hmmm, I’ve got a friend of a friend who’s done an art installation on this very topic. I feel another post coming on…
Let’s face it: this issue isn’t going away. There will always be more to say, particularly as chop shops open in malls and people cease to think of it as surgery. And cease to realize that it’s not always reversable, to say the least.
March 31st, 2008 at 7:45 pm
La Petite Acadienne, I was going to post about a friend of mine from high school who has nearly the exact same story. She had her reduction done over summer vacation, and came back to school in the fall ready to explain it away (if anyone asked) as having lost weight — not entirely untrue. She finished school happier and healthier than she would have otherwise.
My youngest daughter suffered a pretty gruesome accident recently, and I fully expect her to ask for cosmetic surgery to rework the scars once she’s school-aged. She’ll have my full support if she does; however, if she starts talking boob jobs because she inherits my small bust, I’ll be putting my foot down.
April 1st, 2008 at 4:27 am
It’s not as if an A cup has held Keira Knightly back.
April 1st, 2008 at 1:44 pm
Aren’t most kids who wear braces just getting cosmetic othodontics? Why is that acceptable, but surgury isn’t? I really don’t know the answer… I know that if I could have chosen surgery or braces, I would have gone under the knife in a heartbeat.
April 3rd, 2008 at 4:07 pm
Leah, I guess you’re right about kids going through orthodontics. However, I feel like there’s an important distinction to be made between straightening one’s teeth and getting bigger boobs. The latter implies all sorts of things about stepping towards the objectification of women and too much importance placed on a part of their body that they should not be worrying about just yet. How many boys get plastic surgery for their bodies in order to look sexier? I feel that all these girls who want plastic surgery too early are getting too much pressure from somewhere or another, be it the media or peers or family or whatever.
Teeth, on the other hand, are something that a) people will notice and be distracted by if they’re crooked (unlike boobs. most people who matter do not zone in on boobs right away, no matter what teen girls think) and b) can lead to complications later in life if they are not corrected earlier on. My friend’s mother had crooked teeth as a child, and when she was older had to have her jaw sewn shut for two months–something she could have avoided by just having a few months of braces as a kid. Having straight teeth is a self-esteem boost that will in no way harm a young girl as she grows up and her body changes.