Teeny Manolo

People are so competitive! They have to have a nicer car, better grades, newer clothes, flashier jewelry. And now they’re even getting competitive about something which cannot be improved upon, for lo, it is perfect.

We speak, of course, of the Cadbury’s Easter Creme Egg.

Perhaps the crowning achievement of British gastronomy, this exquisite delicacy is justly renowned for its unmatchable ability to deliver massive quantities of silky fats and sugary goodness to the gaping maw of the eager consumer. Is this not enough?

No, apparently not: one reckless sugar junkie has seen fit to up the stakes and, yes, pimp it!

Pimp My Cadbury’s Easter Creme Egg:

After deciding to get pimping it took us about five seconds to plump for a Cadburys Creme Egg. We decided not to let the fact that it had been pimped before put us off because we thought we could make the Creme de la Creme Egg!

The ingredients:

1.5 kg of Cadburys Milk Chocolate
3lbs of granulated sugar
2 x 140 g bottles of liquid glucose
vanilla extract
red food colouring
yellow food colouring

Our first challenge was obtaining out of season Creme Eggs for comparison and mid-pimp snacking but that was solved thanks to the internet. Three days later we were the proud owners of 48 of them!

And it goes on from there, pictograph by fat-clotted pictograph. We post this only as a warning to those who see no harm in a little one-upmanship. To those who file such blasphemy under “just a little fun.” Indeed, Easter is one of the holiest holidays of the Christian calendar, and constructing a bloated replicant of the magnificent Easter Creme Egg is no way to remember this solemn occasion.

Jesus, my friends, is no size queen.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, March 4th, 2008 at 4:27 pm by raincoaster and is filed under Bring It, Diversions, Holidays, That's Just Wrong. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.