A Bit Green, Ladies?
By Glinda
My husband has Mondays off work, so he is kind enough to take the Munchkin to school while I sleep some more clean the house.
The other day the phone rang. It was him.
“Hey, the teacher put out this schedule for parent-teacher conferences and I’ve got it right here.”
I said, “All right, tell me what times are already taken.”
“Well, there’s only one taken, and that’s at 2:30.”
“Hmmm, let’s see, I wonder when is the best time for the neighbor to babysit because the conference doesn’t really take all that long and-”
“Babe!”
“What?”
“I need you to decide. Like now.”
“Fine, I’ll take 3:15.”
“Good, I’ll put you down.”
Later when he got home, he told me that he was holding onto the clipboard for dear life as we were on the phone. Apparently all the other mothers, late as usual, were circling around him and eyeing the schedule. He told me he was almost afraid they were going to rip it out of his hands.
I patted him on the shoulder and assured him he did good.
They’re just mad because they don’t have their husband trained half as well.
February 7th, 2008 at 9:51 pm
Hello, hello, is this thing on?
Man, I didn’t think my post sucked this badly! My husband is going to be crushed!
February 7th, 2008 at 10:07 pm
Oh, they’re all just jealous!
What IS that thing? I thought Play Doh was repellent, but then they invented slime. Did someone look at kids toys and think “well you know, they’re just not ugly enough!”
Don’t answer that.
February 7th, 2008 at 11:03 pm
It’s a “little green-eyed monster.” It’s a crocheted thing off of Etsy. I have the link right below.
February 7th, 2008 at 11:23 pm
Glinda, no one knows how to respond… A husband that picks up kid from daycare? And wants to go to parent-teacher conference? Does not compute……
February 8th, 2008 at 1:58 am
But…my literal-minded self will not allow this to pass unchallenged. It may be little. It certainly IS green. But it’s a little, green, eyed monster. None of those eyes is green!
February 8th, 2008 at 8:58 am
That thing in the middle is another eye? I thought it was a toothy maw. (Given previously displayed Lovecraftian tendencies on this blog, I actually thought you’d found a plush shoggoth much cuter, and more shoggothy, than this one.)
February 8th, 2008 at 11:40 am
Sounds like your husband is awesome. I just didn’t respond due to not having any sort of similar experience due to a) not having any kids…yet, and b) living in such a rural area that the whole competition-for-time thing isn’t really a factor.
February 8th, 2008 at 11:05 pm
It takes a real man to fight off a horde of moms who all want what’s in your hands!
February 9th, 2008 at 3:07 pm
@TeleriB- I think I like mine better, even though it isn’t a shoggoth! And we all know how much raincoaster likes her Cthulhus. Or is it Cthulhui?
February 10th, 2008 at 1:18 am
She does. In fact, I featured a “Congeries of Bubbles,” otherwise known as Yog-Sothoth, just the other day.
http://raincoaster.com/2008/02/07/pic-o-the-day-dragonfly/