Ah, those painful conversations. So necessary. So helpful. So conducive to personal growth.

So painful.

We’ve all lived through them.

The facts of life. The facts of other people’s lives. The fact that the drawers of Mommy and Daddy’s nightstands are locked for good reason. All these things and more must be explained to the innocent little children, repeatedly if necessary, so that by the time they reach adulthood they will be au fait with the borders denoting the private parts of life and will refrain from mentioning them at the dinner table. Failing that, it is devoutly to be hoped they will at least know enough to know when to keep their mouths shut about the unmentionable unmentionableness of the unmentionable(s).

Someone needs to explain that to Fireman French here.

An eight-year-old boy had to be freed by firefighters after getting stuck in a pair of handcuffs he found in his mother’s bedroom…The crew had to use industrial metal cutters to free the boy…

Firefighter Dan French told Portsmouth’s The News: ‘The little boy came to the fire station with his grandmother and had the cuffs hanging from one wrist.

“Before we released him I asked if he was on the run from the police but he assured me he wasn’t…

“It’s beyond my wildest imagination why someone would keep handcuffs in their bedroom!”