Bedazzle Your Way to the Top!
By GlindaParents who enter their children into beauty pageants have always been a source of confusion for me. Are they trying to live vicariously through their offspring? Do they ever stop to think that the emphasis they are placing on looks (despite the vocal protests that it is really all about learning to speak in public as well as their child’s intense love of dance) will distort their self image? That their child may not remember the valuable lessons of friendly competition, but simply that life is a big contest and the one who looks best wins?
I’m not sure what motivates them to participate in such displays, but it certainly isn’t the chance to wear really pretty dresses. Some of these numbers would be rejected by the Ice Capades for being too flashy. That and the fact that the skaters would never make it more than an inch off the ice due to the weight of the assorted bling.
Apparently the higher you get in competition level, the higher the level of bedazzlement required. I wonder if they hand out sunglasses to the audience at the nationals? Or maybe the whole point is to blind the judges?
I know, I have more questions than answers.
If there was ever a time to say “Ayyyy!” this is it! I’m sure the Manolo will forgive me for stealing his signature cry of disapproval.
January 25th, 2008 at 1:07 pm
My eyes!
January 25th, 2008 at 3:39 pm
I don’t know if anyone has seen Miss America, Reality Check but if the goal of child pageants is to prepare for national competition then they are getting ready to put all of these people out of business! Big hair, too much make up, bling bling costumes and stiff postures are history. Whatever are the pageant coaches and gown designers going to do?
January 25th, 2008 at 4:51 pm
I see your ‘Ayyyy!’ and raise you a Blergghh! Elvis wore more tasteful things when he played Vegas. I think Liberace may have, too.
January 25th, 2008 at 7:27 pm
AYYYY! MY EYES! MY EYES!
Those dresses are possessed by the spirit of Bob Mackie! Who’s judging these contests, Cher and Tanya Tucker?
January 25th, 2008 at 10:12 pm
So. Wrong.
January 26th, 2008 at 12:18 am
The world of Irish stepdancing competition is going the way of beauty pageants–sequins, feathers, tulle, too much makeup, and too expensive for most people on a normal income to participate in. Thankfully the national commission that runs the competitions has determined that starting in a couple of years, the dance costumes will all be standardized–cheaper and not looking like a Las Vegas dancer’s costume with more fabric.
January 26th, 2008 at 9:51 pm
Outstanding. My childhood memories of the Pig & Whistle were at risk of being corrupted.
Seriously, those dresses look like lampshades in an Old West bordello.