Stripped | Teeny Manolo


By Glinda

Like Buttah

Christina Aguilera is stripped, all right.

I know that in this age of digital retouching and trying to make things look perfect even when they are far from it, I am foolish to even ask. But I am going to anyway. Where are the stretch marks?

Looking at that creamsicle-colored expanse of flesh, I can’t help but gaze in amazement at how perfect it is. Well, as perfect as distinctly orange-looking skin can be.

I don’t care if the ex-Dirrty girl has enough money to pay 10 magic elves to constantly slather her abdomen with Creme De La Mer, in that stage of pregnancy, stretchage has occurred.

Why are the marks on your skin, made when your body was accomodating the growth of a tiny little person inside of you, seen as so ugly by so many women? Christina and the editors of Marie Claire among them, apparently. I’ve heard perfectly beautiful women bemoan the existence of their stretch marks as if they were some sort of horrible brand, dooming them to a life of unattractiveness.

Honestly, I feel like shaking them. And not gently.

Get over it. When you signed up for the mom gig, your knew your body was going to change. And if you can’t deal with the changes, some permanent, some not, then maybe a reexamination of priorities is necessary.

I say stretch marks should be worn with pride. No one has a body that is flawless, and why do we keep trying to pretend they do?

24 Responses to “Stripped”

  1. Suzanne Says:

    You make a good point. I will try to celebrate my stretch marks instead of cursing them. But that doesn’t mean I’ll like them. Oh no. To like them is asking too much.

  2. Andrea Says:

    I agree that strecthmarks should be worn with pride and I’m tired of all the airbrushed celebrities. But in Christina’s defense (I can’t believe I just said that), I never got stretch marks on my tummy with either of my kids. My thighs however, are another story. It used to bother me, but now I wear them proudly!

  3. Lori Says:

    I’m just backing up what Andrea says here. As much as airbrushing irks me, Christina and I have similar due dates, and can tell you that I don’t have stretch marks yet, so it’s possible. By no means am I flawless or pretending to be – certainly it doesn’t make me any less of a mom.

    I’m sure by the end of this that there will be lots of things that change physically about me. I think the key to the argument is that, instead of being ashamed, celebrate these “markers” as a testimony to the truly awesome feat your body has pulled off 🙂

  4. JessT Says:

    I don’t know what the big deal is, lady. I’m 8 mos pregnant and my body is that perfect! 🙂 Ha! Ha!

  5. Glinda Says:

    Yeah, I was going to say, am I the only person that got stretch marks or what? And I didn’t even get that many, but still, my belly did not look utterly flawless, that’s for sure.

    I wonder if youth has anything to do with it? I had my son at 31, so the skin had no dewey, youthful glow.

  6. dgm Says:

    I know I shouldn’t say it because I think most women do get stretch marks, but I didn’t get them either. (Now don’t be hatin’ on me, Glinda). I hear that it’s hereditary, and I think it also depends on how big the baby is. Mine were both on the small side. I certainly wasn’t rubbing expensive cream on ma belly.

    If they were showing Julia Roberts without stretch marks, then I’d be skeptical.

  7. Natalie Says:

    I have more stretch marks than I count, thanks to my two beautiful daughters. But my mom, who is a much bigger person than I was even when pregnant doesn’t have a single one. Hardly seems fair. I do think it odd that all these celebrity moms who bare their bellies show no stretch marks. Surely they’re not as lucky as my mom…at least not all of them.

  8. Laura V Says:

    I don’t know. A friend of mine recently told me she didn’t have stretch marks until her due date, which she considered unfair — going through the WHOLE pregnancy and then BAM, right at the end!

    Not that I think Xtina looks at all natural, there, but the lack of stretch marks might NOT be the result of airbrushing, just of luck.

  9. Glinda Says:

    Well let me ask this- Do you all think that if she DID have stretch marks, that they would have kept them?

    My guess is no way.

  10. raincoaster Says:

    You want to talk about unfair? I’ve never even been pregnant, but I got stretch marks at 13, because I gained weight!

    Xtina is no Demi Moore; she looks like an expensive novelty hooker in that shot.

  11. slackermommy Says:

    She’s definitely been airbrushed. She may or may not have stretch marks but there is no way her skin is that dewy and perfect. As for the stretch mark debate; I don’t know why some women get them and some don’t. My mom had a map of stretch marks on her belly but I only got one tiny one on my stomach with my 4th pregnancy but got several on my hips with my first.

  12. Caitlin Says:

    I’ve got a friend who just gave birth. She never got stretch marks- just the most photogenic belly you’ve ever seen. She never got cankles either.

  13. Glinda Says:

    Fine, all you ladies and the friends/relatives of you ladies who have never gotten stretch marks, I dislike you intensely.

    And, I only got swollen ankles AFTER the pregnancy, for about a week. Which made it worse, because I obviously wasn’t pregnant anymore, and people just thought I had grotesque-looking ankles.

  14. class-factotum Says:

    Xtina is no Demi Moore

    Yeah. Christina has talent.

  15. Liz Says:

    Wow! Interesting comments going on! I have stretch marks on the belly and the boobs. Much as I would love to airbrush them out every time I get in the shower and catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror, they aren’t going away. It’s been so long since my girls were born that I’m just used to them now. They are just part of my body now. I can’t even remember not having them. I’m pretty sure Christina is airbrushed in these pictures.

  16. patois Says:

    I’ll be proud of my stretch marks, but not my stretch pants, okay?

  17. Eilish Says:

    My sister and I got stretch marks, neither of my sisters-in-law did, I think it’s mostly genetic. As I don’t regularly bare my belly to magazine covers, they just don’t bother me that much. I do have to share a GREAT story my friend Lisa just told me the other day though.

    She was feeling sort of down on herself the other day when her three year old son (she has twins) wandered in. She was changing her shirt when Joey looked up and said, “Mommy, you are so pretty!” She grinned and said, “Thanks, Joe! What do you think is pretty?” (She was thinking he liked her shirt.) Joey answered, “You have all those pretty purple stripes in your tummy!”

    I haven’t laughed that hard in months.

  18. Ruth Says:

    I agree that stretch marks seem mostly to be genetic, based on an extremely unscientific survey of friends and relatives. I got TONS, really major ones from my groin up to the bottom of my ribs almost. One day my autistic son, who likes to lay his head on my jiggly belly, looked at it intently for a minute, pointed at the stretch marks and said “train tracks!”

  19. Leah Says:

    On a different note, is it safe for her to still be tanning while pregnant? I mean you’re basically irradiating yourself. Maybe it all comes out of a bottle? And if so, perhaps the orange paint helps hide the stretch marks like it hides some other skin discoloration.

  20. raincoaster Says:

    I’m pretty sure this is spray-on tan. She was rocking the porcelain complexion a week previously, and most of Hollywood is all about the spray-on now. And I have absolutely zero doubt she has been airbrushed to infinity. Ever seen that girl au naturel? Yikes!

  21. Amynan Says:

    Not everyone gets stretch marks. I didn’t and I was HUGE!
    Really, you just sound jealous and petty. And the tan is most likely spray on. Who wants to look like a pasty white beached whale?
    I am ashamed of the snarkiness displayed here.

  22. Glinda Says:

    Amnynan, I suggest you read through the entire thread of comments.

    And actually, none of the snarkiness is directly AT Ms. Aguilera, it is more about the false perfection that seems to pervade media images than anything.

    Many people find perfect white skin a la Dita Von Teese to be attractive. And really, who wants to be orange? I don’t mind some color, but orange isn’t it.

  23. JessT Says:

    Orange, yes. That was not the best color, but admit it Glinda, it makes you feel better that the color turned out so poorly doesn’t it?? Ha ha. 🙂

  24. Lisa Says:

    I have to say, my body looked a heckuva lot better during pregnancy than immediately after. During pregnancy I was all puffed up and glowy. But postpartum, that’s when the stretch marks and the sagging appeared. I don’t mind the stretch marks at all, but the sagging . . . it’s much harder to embrace the sagging.

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