Baby Bumpers: Milla Jovovich

I see it’s an outie. Here’s the lovely Milla Jovovich, your basic immigrant megasuccess story. If I can make a wee confession here, I was always jealous of her; the international modeling career at eleven, the really quite sophisticated album at eighteen, the ice-blue eyes, the fashion line, the men, the movies, the millions.

And now, I have one more thing to be jealous of: how good she looks pregnant. You can see by her arms that she’s put on a bit of weight all over relative to her acting weight, but not vast, Fergie-like amounts. And she is living proof that your looks won’t go to pot when you do that. She feels no need to cover up those decidedly un-stringy arms. Those sexy female hormones need some lipids to work their magic.

One must confess, however, that an eight-months-and-looks-about-to-pop woman watching a horror flick like Resident Evil:Extinction isn’t exactly an advertisement for how gut-wrenchingly horrifying the movie may be. Sure, sure, she’s starring in it. She knows how it ends. I’m just thinking that, if Mama Jovovich’s nerves were less steely, the future Milla Junior’s rebirthing sessions could have been very interesting.