There is No Known Cure

I hadn’t expected it really.

 

But it is that time of year, and of course, there it was.

 

The Back-to-School sale.

 

Now, my son is still in preschool, so I had planned on carrying over into fall the majority of his summer clothing. Because where I live, you can wear shorts during the day well into October and sometimes November. But, he had the nerve to go through a growth spurt just at the wrong time.  I scolded him on the way over to the store. “Don’t you know,”  I glared at him through the rear-view mirror “that you are only allowed to grow when the weather has changed?  No more growing in the off-season, Mister!”

 

When we arrived, I begin looking through the racks, and suddenly, I was no longer aware of my surroundings.  My son could have climbed out of his stroller and attempted to hitchhike his way across the state, and I would have been none the wiser.

 

The colors and styles of the clothes began to blur, all I could comprehend was that they were 60% off.

And before I knew it, I was standing there with six shirts, four pairs of shorts, a sweater, and a waffled long sleeved Henley.

Nervously, I looked across the rack and saw another mother clutching even more clothes than me.  Her breathing was shallow, and she looked as if she didn’t know exactly where she was.

 

We had both fallen victim to what experts like to term the “Sale Induced Trance” or SIT for short.  SIT gives us the ability to sort through dozens of items placed in the wrong section with lightning speed.  It also gives us an almost superhuman ability to work out proper percentages in our brains, even if we have to use a calculator to tip at a restaurant.

 

By some stroke of fortune or perhaps just too much caffeine, I was able to shake off the effects of SIT.  Because even though the Ralph Lauren shirt was only six bucks, it was pink, orange and blue.   Even Mr. Lauren can’t make me purchase something so badly color-coordinated. I put it back on the rack to join its fellow ugly brethren, of which there were more than just a few.

 

At the checkout register, I caught a glimpse of that same orange, pink and blue combination.  It was my fellow shopper.  I sighed and walked out of the store. SIT had claimed yet another victim.

 

Sale Induced Trance

Woman exhibiting a classic SIT symptom: the glassy-eyed stare

 

 

10 Responses to “There is No Known Cure”

  1. michaelm August 28, 2007 at 8:06 am #

    My wife knows all about “SIT” :0)
    Brilliant post.
    ~m

  2. Captain Corky August 28, 2007 at 9:39 am #

    On sunday my wife and I went to the mall and bought three jumpers of 25 bucks from the The Childrens Place. Not a bad deal at all. I just hope Max doesn’t out grow them at least until October.

  3. Ginger August 28, 2007 at 12:06 pm #

    My son has grown very little in the last few years. He’s gotten taller but his waist has stayed the same. This summer he wore a lot of last year’s clothes. This is fortunate because shopping for him (or especially with him) is torture. I bring them home he tries them on, I take them back. He’s gotten too tall for his waist size. (Too short is okay because you can hem but too tall means you have to buy everything too big.) Luckily, he is mostly happy in sweat pants.

  4. Awesome Mom August 28, 2007 at 12:30 pm #

    Haha I have been a victim of SIT. I buy ahead so sometimes I will be digging out the wardrobe for the next season and wonder what I was thinking when I look at some of the things I bought.

  5. Mel August 28, 2007 at 12:51 pm #

    I like to this of SIT as meditation. The mind clears and all that remains is the search for bargains.

  6. Cathy August 28, 2007 at 1:22 pm #

    I too buy ahead, but that doesn’t always work out so well. My youngest, a 4 month old boy, is now the size of an 9 month old, so now the seasons are all messed up! A friend of mine will hopefully take these clothes off my hands for her pregnant friends having boys.

    Sometimes I’m so deep in my trance that I buy stuff as gifts for other kids, even if I don’t have an occasion or child in mind. I’m talking under $5 items at Gymboree and it’s Gymbucks time! I’ll even convince myself that if nothing else, I can resell it at a yard sale for more than I paid. Truly dillusional.

  7. ~Sherylhs August 28, 2007 at 3:25 pm #

    Grandma wanted to take the Bug to a luncheon with her friends. So of course he had to be dressed to the nines, like Granny. We went in to The Children’s Place at the local mall.

    Four shirts, two shorts and 6 pairs of socks later, all I can tell you is Grandma’s are susceptible to SIT also.

    Great post!

  8. raincoaster August 28, 2007 at 4:12 pm #

    Have you tried bourbon? A sufficient dosage will get you through almost anything, although your children may come out looking like psychedelic backup dancers.

  9. Glinda August 28, 2007 at 7:43 pm #

    Michael- Thank you!

    Capt. Corky- That’s a really good price!

    Ginger- You got lucky on that one, my friend. :)

    AM- I’ve done the same thing, and sometimes I’ve left them in bags and forgotten about them.

    Mel- As long as they are good bargains!

    Cathy- I’ve been there! And I hate it when they skip seasons like that. They do it so often when they are babies.

    Sheryl- Not my mom, can I trade with you?

    Raincoaster- Bourbon for the kid, or for us? ;)

  10. raincoaster August 28, 2007 at 9:00 pm #

    Depends on whether or not you’re from Kentucky, of course.